John D. Spooner is an investment adviser, author and novelist. His most recent book is the Boston Globe No. 1 best-seller No One Ever Told Us That, a collection of letters with life lessons for his grandchildren. Here, he responds to queries from advice seekers of all ages. Send your conundrums to thedance@improper.com.

I sent out invitations to my ultra-lavish wedding two months ago. The deadline for RSVPs is one day away, and I’ve only received about 50 percent of the RSVPs. I feel like it’s a privilege to be invited to a wedding in general, and especially one of this caliber. My guests have a choice of four appetizers and four entrees, and an open bar with fine wines and top-shelf liquor. And it’s not an annoying all-day affair—it’s a 5 pm wedding with the shortest ceremony ever! So I don’t understand how people are taking their sweet time with this. How easy is it to pick your food and pop the thing in the mail or simply decline? I feel like if you’re not going, decline ASAP so it gives the hosts a chance to invite their B-lists for crying out loud! Anyhow, my question is, how should I go about confirming the RSVPs that haven’t come in? Do I call the people or just assume they are not coming? I have a deadline when I must submit our food choices and seating chart, and I wouldn’t want to accommodate people who forgot to RSVP, but at the same time I would feel bad if I told them there is no more space for them… Oh what to do!

Coincidentally, I went to a 5 pm wedding last night, and I’m still in bed at brunch time. I asked the mother of the bride about her experience with the invitation process. “Well, this woman who asked the question did everything right,” she said, “except anticipating the cluelessness and lack of manners in today’s America.”

I know that one of the problems here is what I call “misinformation overload.” We’re all swamped with social media, texting and email. But old-fashioned invitations on fine paper stock should get even clueless people’s attention.

My friend, the mother of the bride, believes in leaving nothing to chance. “I was prepared for even my best friends to let their responses slip between the cracks. So when invitations were sent, I called my five most obsessive-compulsive friends and got them to promise that the day after the responses were due, they would come to lunch at my house with their cellphones. We split up the list of everyone who hadn’t responded and called them. Made it easy, social and fun. Made it a game.”

Her last thoughts on the subject: “Half of the guests not responding is kind of shocking. Maybe I’d tell them, ‘Don’t bother coming—just send a present.’ ”

I say, let them eat cake!

With a baby on the way, I’m looking to start a 529 plan for her to hopefully offset crazy college costs. (It seems like it could be six figures a year by 2030!) But I saw that the Massachusetts fund scores very poorly. Should I invest elsewhere so that I have more autonomy over the growth of the investment?

For those reading this question, the basic 529 plans are investment vehicles primarily designed to fund college education. The monies that flow into them are free from taxes on income and gains. When withdrawals are taken for tuition payments, they also come out of the plans tax-free. There is no tax advantage to buying strictly Massachusetts offerings. You can go to any state, and there seem to be endless choices for the consumer. Go to savingforcollege.com, which offers about as much information as anyone can handle. I think it’s a fine and efficient way to save for something so important and increasingly expensive.

One alternative that gives a lot of leeway is the custodian account—it’s very flexible, with almost no restrictions on what you can put into the account when it comes to stocks and bonds. But income and capital gains are completely taxable, and you can give up a lot for this flexibility. Quick answers are often not enough for investors, but these quick answers, I hope, will at least get you started.

Hi there! I’m hoping you can help. I went to get a perm at a Boston salon—pretty well known, in fact. However, the perm didn’t hold, and I had to go in for another perm. Again the perm did not hold, and I was not satisfied. The stylist told me it would work, and I thought that’s what a consultation was for? If she’s familiar with my type of hair, then why would it not hold? I’ve tried calling and emailing the salon but got no response back. Am I asking too much to get a partial refund? Or is that how the hair business is? Pay $200 for a perm and get ripped off for no results?

Well, nothing in life is permanent, not even a perm. People who promise us things disappoint us all the time. How about no-show contractors? Plumber’s-crack plumbers who never really fix the leak? The cable guy? The millions who say for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, till death do us part? Or CEOs who, shaking hands on a merger deal, say, “Nothing will change!” when what they mean is “Everything will change!”

Feel better about the perm now? No? Well, I have two suggestions. The first: It will be worth spending a little money with another stylist to find out if the problem is the hairdresser or your hair. Give it another try.

The second: At the new salon, tell them up front that you have a lot of friends in the media—and that if you are happy with your new perm, you will spread the word. This also implies that if you are unhappy, word will get around. Know what I’m saying? Makes you different from the other customers. They’ll pay more attention.

But you did get a second perm for free.