BREAKFAST PIZZA (WINNER)
Breakfast is the most important meal of the day, and at least for the purposes of this issue, pizza is the most important of all the food groups. Breakfast pizza is like a warm hug to ease you into your day, and around town you’ll find the classic eggs-and-bakey base topped with everything from Parmesan and truffle at Foundry on Elm to creamy spinach at Russell House. Any way you slice it, you’re going to have a good morning. BONUS: Any leftover pizza can be breakfast pizza when you eat it cold, in your pajamas, the morning after.
DESSERT PIZZA
Sorry, chocolate lovers: We love a pan full of empty calories as much as the next guy, but as intoxicating as it is at first bite, dessert pizza can be just a little too much. Often careening from guilty pleasure territory straight into the wilds of sugar overload, most dessert pizzas are simply trying too hard. Marshmallows, caramel AND peanut butter swirls? Pass the cheese, please.
SANTARPIO’S (WINNER)
We’ll admit, this was a tough call. The merits of both these Boston ’za legends are as varied as a pie with everything on it, don’t hold the anchovies. However, we’ve got to give the golden pepperoni to Santarpio’s, an Eastie mainstay since longer than anyone on the Improper staff has been alive, serving up no-frills, no-pretentions pizza that could actually cut the mustard, er, tomato sauce, for any New Yawker who wandered in.
REGINA’S
No disrespect to Regina’s though. We would never say no to a slice from the beloved North End joint, which is similarly no-frills (with the exception of the craft beer list). They score points for a more varied menu, with interesting—and high-quality—toppings, and an old-school pizzeria vibe (though not quite as old-school as the deliciously divey Santarpio’s).
BAGEL PIZZA
No, we’re not talking Bagel Bites. (They’re admittedly addictive, but also burn the roof of your mouth. Every. Single. Time.) We’re talking homemade bagel pizzas. The good stuff, though not quite as good as its English muffin brethren. Bagel pizza, like deep dish, is just way too crust heavy. All that dough throws off the delicate dance of sauce, cheese and spices, taking center stage like a starchy spotlight hog. Not cool, bagel.
ENGLISH MUFFIN PIZZA (WINNER)
Two words: nooks and crannies. So many crispy, crusty alcoves in which our toppings can canoodle, meeting in a perfectly balanced union.
SOBER PIZZA
Honestly, there’s never a wrong time—or state of inebriation—for pizza. Pizza is always delicious. Even when pizza is bad, pizza is good.
DRUNK PIZZA (WINNER)
BUT. Everything tastes better drunk. And pizza? Eating pizza drunk is the intoxicated dining equivalent of riding through clouds made of rainbows and kittens on the back of a unicorn who delivers pizza in 10 minutes or less. Hence the lines of sauced 20-somethings snaking out of the North End’s Caffé Pompeii, Allston’s Bravo, Brookline’s Pino’s and Back Bay’s Little Steve’s, all bar-adjacent and open late.
THIN CRUST (WINNER)
Obviously.
DEEP DISH
Go back to Chicago with that noise. Da bears.
Eyes on the Pies
A Definitive Guide to Boston Pizza.
By Improper Staff Sept. 26, 2014
BREAKFAST PIZZA (WINNER)
Breakfast is the most important meal of the day, and at least for the purposes of this issue, pizza is the most important of all the food groups. Breakfast pizza is like a warm hug to ease you into your day, and around town you’ll find the classic eggs-and-bakey base topped with everything from Parmesan and truffle at Foundry on Elm to creamy spinach at Russell House. Any way you slice it, you’re going to have a good morning. BONUS: Any leftover pizza can be breakfast pizza when you eat it cold, in your pajamas, the morning after.
DESSERT PIZZA
Sorry, chocolate lovers: We love a pan full of empty calories as much as the next guy, but as intoxicating as it is at first bite, dessert pizza can be just a little too much. Often careening from guilty pleasure territory straight into the wilds of sugar overload, most dessert pizzas are simply trying too hard. Marshmallows, caramel AND peanut butter swirls? Pass the cheese, please.
SANTARPIO’S (WINNER)
We’ll admit, this was a tough call. The merits of both these Boston ’za legends are as varied as a pie with everything on it, don’t hold the anchovies. However, we’ve got to give the golden pepperoni to Santarpio’s, an Eastie mainstay since longer than anyone on the Improper staff has been alive, serving up no-frills, no-pretentions pizza that could actually cut the mustard, er, tomato sauce, for any New Yawker who wandered in.
REGINA’S
No disrespect to Regina’s though. We would never say no to a slice from the beloved North End joint, which is similarly no-frills (with the exception of the craft beer list). They score points for a more varied menu, with interesting—and high-quality—toppings, and an old-school pizzeria vibe (though not quite as old-school as the deliciously divey Santarpio’s).
BAGEL PIZZA
No, we’re not talking Bagel Bites. (They’re admittedly addictive, but also burn the roof of your mouth. Every. Single. Time.) We’re talking homemade bagel pizzas. The good stuff, though not quite as good as its English muffin brethren. Bagel pizza, like deep dish, is just way too crust heavy. All that dough throws off the delicate dance of sauce, cheese and spices, taking center stage like a starchy spotlight hog. Not cool, bagel.
ENGLISH MUFFIN PIZZA (WINNER)
Two words: nooks and crannies. So many crispy, crusty alcoves in which our toppings can canoodle, meeting in a perfectly balanced union.
SOBER PIZZA
Honestly, there’s never a wrong time—or state of inebriation—for pizza. Pizza is always delicious. Even when pizza is bad, pizza is good.
DRUNK PIZZA (WINNER)
BUT. Everything tastes better drunk. And pizza? Eating pizza drunk is the intoxicated dining equivalent of riding through clouds made of rainbows and kittens on the back of a unicorn who delivers pizza in 10 minutes or less. Hence the lines of sauced 20-somethings snaking out of the North End’s Caffé Pompeii, Allston’s Bravo, Brookline’s Pino’s and Back Bay’s Little Steve’s, all bar-adjacent and open late.
THIN CRUST (WINNER)
Obviously.
DEEP DISH
Go back to Chicago with that noise. Da bears.
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